Time present and time past
Are both perhaps present in time future
And time future contained in time past.
If all time is eternally present
All time is unredeemable.
What might have been is an abstraction
Remaining a perpetual possibility
Only in a world of speculation.
T.S. Eliot, Burnt Norton.
Those who say, “It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all” are sociopaths. Losing love — real love — is earth-shattering. It turns you in upon yourself — “What did I do to make them leave? To pull away? To let me go?” — regardless of circumstance or timing or logic. Allowing someone into your life is scary. For those of us who have been betrayed deeply by those who were supposed to keep us safe, it is paralyzing. We fight it. We sabotage it. We push back hard against it…
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