Memories in Withdrawal


Raw Earth Ink

When they placed him in my arms, he weighed nothing at all

I didn’t even know how to hold him

The moment I looked into his face, I felt something burst and bloom in my heart

Something I had never felt before and never have since

Even today I feel the tug of his existence on mine

Like a rope tied to my heart, pulling right through my ribs and far far far away

“He’s the smallest baby I’ve ever seen”

The priest tried to reassure me

Gentle pats on my arm

I saw his faith was shaken

His voice trembling as he began to speak

Before closing his mouth, half-uttered thoughts he’d said a hundred times before

His eyes never leaving the face of my son

One last tap on my wrist

And he shuffled out of my room

Head hung low, defeated

Sometimes I held him tightly


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